Entry 1 – Introduction [16/04/2025]

Hello, reader.

I have several reasons for wanting to start this blog.

Firstly, as an attempt to get back into writing. This used to be an activity that I enjoyed thoroughly, but for the past couple of years didn’t really have the opportunity or energy to properly get into anything. I mean I have written a few songs and poems here and there, but the amount of actual writing I did was greatly reduced. There’s a fanfic that I really want to write and I hope that this can give me some practice, or at least get me back in the flow of writing.

And secondly, to try and understand the parts of my mind that for some reason I had locked away as of recently. I’ve made it sound dramatic, but it’s mostly just remembering what I did in the week. Although, my inability to remember might actually be hinting towards something deeper; residual from the time I was depressed, but I guess we’ll see. Not sure why I got the EME type sentence structure there, but uhh yeah 💀 anyways-

I’m sure there’s other reasons somewhere in my head, but I’ve not had breakfast yet (it’s almost noon) and I don’t feel like trying to put them into words right now. So there’s your introduction for now, and something below to start things off.

Yesterday evening, I went to go meet one of my best friends, <aBvA5Qri>*, at his house. It’s a walking distance away, and he insisted on walking with me because that’s an iconic move from him. There’s also a lot of greenery around his neighbourhood (which I have been deprived of cause mine is small and most of the grass has died). I was there from about 5 to 9 PM. We talked, played Battleship, listened to music, played music on his guitar (I played him mood ring baby cause it reminds me of him <3), played a slightly violent two-player card game that I taught him, talked more (but deep thoughts with the deep), and were overall silly together. Since this isn’t one of my usual diary entries and information isn’t already implied, I’ll explicitly state here that I love him a lot and I'm grateful to be able to spend time with him. 💚🐛.

Tomorrow morning, I have to go to therapy, and I am low-key scared. It’s like my fourth or fifth session probably. I took therapy sessions last year as well, at around the same time/season. But this year, I’m actively trying to be more truthful and also observant of my own state of mind, so I feel like it’s tiring me out more intensely. But hopefully, this also means that we’re addressing the issues more effectively? We stay winning (?).

Okay I’m getting tired now so I’m just gonna end it here, I don’t have a closing for this uhhh, bye and have a nice day-

*friend’s name replaced with random string