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It's alost 3am now so take whatever I'm writing with a grain of salt or whatever. I'll probably delete this later anyways. Also 18+ please. I'm gonna be vague but I feel it's connected.
But I've always felt like I've had a problem with just knowing how to talk to people. I'm anxious in my day to day by my own doing, and growing up, I was never a 'fandom' kid. I was in a different place that didn't allow me to flourish naturally. Spaces for adults. So I think because of having to mature much quicker in those situations, and the fact a lot of my interactions were simply roleplay instead of actually talking about normal stuff, it's stunted my growth and ability to talk normal.
Maybe I'm just paranoid, and I talk fine and dandy. But I can't help but feel that I'm just not good at talking about topics, or responding in ways that makes others want to talk more about themselves or whatevr. Maybe It's just good to get this off my chest in a public place.
I'll try to do better.
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Howl_TTM
Both of ya'll are right, I'm gonna keep this advice with me, thanks <3
Liminal Sunset
I think society shift towards individualism and isolation, as well as media overexposure, create expectations in people that are unrealistic.
First interactions with someone are awkward by default. Its normal - you have not ever seen this person before, and your brain is trying to figure out if that person is safe to be around, while navigating the small talk maze. And its a skill, the more its done, the better you get at it.
I come from the culture that is very extroverted, lets say. So people often start conversations in supermarket and ATM lines, public transport, etc. A lot of those interactions are a bit akward but thats okay, thats how they are supposed to be - its not a movie, its real life. They are fun nevertheless. I miss this a lot now when I live in France.
And also: people will not remember that "akwardness" at all. Noone is sitting at home thinking how you are weird in particular. Everyone has too much on their mind, 2 minutes convo wih a stranger is really just a tiny tiny fraction of it.
Naniadoll
I do think you're too much in your head. Try not to worry about how other people will respond because you really come across as a genuinely cool person. And dude, roleplay fucking rocks ✮⋆˙