piss girl

they rest on the counter my hair still in the sink 
warm like piss running down my legs in school  
and feeling just as stupid

the embarrassment stings harder in the morning
and the light reminds you what you did
every step you feel the sting
and every shower feel the burn

call yourself stupid in your head 
say it again and dont act on it 
be content with your incompetence 
tell yourself its just who you are

dont try to improve
dont try to get better
stay just the way you are
walk around knowing YOU chose this 
no one made your choices for you
you could get better but you wont
its too difficult 
youre too tired.

make up excuse after excuse to rationalize the fact that every day
every second
every minute
every hour
you are letting go of your control
you arent loosing it youre letting it slip away