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TW!!!!! mentions of suicide/self harm (be warned and stay safe!!)
very scared for tmwr. tmwr will officially mean that i've been clean from self-harm for a year and also since i tried to end my own life. i thought i would be more happy, but im honestly nervous???
im scared something may happen that'll take me back to the headspace i was in a year ago (can you believe it? a year man..). what if something happens? what if my mom ruins my day? what if my ex tries to do something to me?
i wanna be happy tmwr, im gonna celebrate w/ my school counselor and one of my best friends. but im still nervous. i've been depressed since i was eight, and i've battled with it since. i had a terrible breakup my freshman year at only 14 years old, leaving in a long and tiring depressive/psychosis episode. my ex tormented me and fucked with my mental that entire time, and i have yet to get an apology fir any of it.
its something so sick to think about what i was going through, what i've been through. and now, im celebrating my second chance at life. although, i've commited to living for the people who didn't survive and lost to suicide, so....im gonna keep going (even if i cry like a toddler tmwr)
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mike
hey, don't worry about it, you've been through a long way and you are very brave for that, i'm sure it won't be as bad as you think it will. wish you the best, congratulations for being sober :) although it's way easier to say it than to actually do it, it's better not to overthink about it. again, it's not going to be that bad and i do wish you a very happy day.
thank you so much! means a lot <3
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