4/5/2024

I hate having the same dream where I go through the same situation in the past several times. I tend to wake up panicked and anxious.

The things I was told years ago never left me. They just won't leave. I hate feeling like this.

I hate to be the kind of person that forgives and just let others run free. I'm not someone who holds grudges though, it seems like I am but I'm not trying to. It just that everything in past keeps on being brought up to me. I would remember certain things and it left with me staring at a random objects for a bit.

Imagining myself waiting for the day to talk to someone that is paid to listen to me is distasteful. The best ways to improve myself without therapy are working out and having a healthy diet but I suck at maintaining a routine.

I don't feel comfortable walking outside daily because I would be asked where I'm going. I don't want to tell you where I'm going and WHY. I don't want to be asked if I'm okay :(

I don't feel capable holding a romantic relationship. I feel like I'm out of love.