Entry #1

Im not sure what negative nostaliga is but I feel that a lot. I feel like in still trapped in that old bady I used to hate. I still hate it. I hate my hair line, I have my curves, I hate my skin color, I hate it all. The added confusion of what I feel like is ruining me and its scary. I feel bellitled by everyone and even by myself at this point. I feel like im boubting everything I have done. Its horror.

Im so tired im so tired and then tomorrow ill be like oh why was I feeling that was im perfectly fine. No your not, you never have been. Its been an endless loop of torture.

It was always ment to be this way.