Poetry :P

Waiting

Am I anything but an unloveable dog?

I follow you eternally

My love shall stay loyal

Yet for as long as i can remember you have ignored me

My cries, my whines

You throw me a bone and i chew

I feast on the piece of kibble you throw me

Even if it hits my nose

Even if it hurts

I'll try to get your attention

Play fetch with me

I'll bring it back

It's the only way ill leave your side

And when i come back will you look at me with lies

Will i keep begging for attention just to feel loved

Must i beg for my rights

Can't you just be truthful

Please

My loving, hungry self

I stay loyal so why must you adopt other dogs

I stay loving always, but the returns are delayed

I stay hungry because you wont feed me

A dog doesn't want cat food just because you want to buy it

Just because it was cheaper

You

You don't text like you used to

You don't care like you used to

You don't love me

All I wanted was you

All you did was treat me like a human being

Was that so rare for me?

When being human was being loved beyond all

Being treated merely kindly was causing obsession 

Your words hurt

Or the lack of

Your hands hurt

Or the lack of

But your love healed

The lack of hurt

Your words were poison to my trained brain

Any form of humanity's real connection 

Any form of love

Any form of care

I was not fed it from a silver spoon until you arrived

So I learnt to lick it off knives

You were not always sweet

Not always sharp

You were a fork

And it hurt me more than the knifes ever would

But you didn't know

I kept apologising 

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm too clingy

I'm too ugly

I'm too tall

I'm too irresponsible 

I'm too chubby

I'm too rude

I'm too annoying 

I'm too apologetic 

But I'm too sorry to leave 

I won't leave like they did to me

Maybe I can fix myself

Maybe if I try enough then you can love me 

But it never comes when you could love me for me

Chocolate icecream

I remember your messages

Telling me I should sleep because of my eye bags

You could tell I was tired

You knew I was tired

Telling me to stop being negative to myself

You could tell I was insecure

You knew I was insecure

Saying goodnight

Promising to text me in the morning

I waited

You said morning

Nothing more

Nothing less

But the texts which used to be my days best

Quickly became less and less

The picture I sent was opened but never replied to

You never knew 

You never figured out why

Why was I calling myself chocolate ice cream

Nothing more

Maybe something less

The true reason I related to that flavour 

Was because it is loved only when it's the only option

If it does become someone's favourite flavour

it's not favourite for long 

What happened to caring

What happened to me to halt your care

What is wrong with me

Why am I always chocolate ice cream

Why are you vanilla

How easy must it feel to be so loved but basic

While I feel so alone

Yet I try my best and pair well with everything 

I'm never loved when I'm alone

I'm always alone

Chess game of melancholy.

You said you were tired

How much do you lie

He said he would play

So why not with I

You both sat down

The game ready to play

No matter how much i wished

I couldn't join you that day

I sat on the side

Processing your lie

As the checkers on the board 

Further mocked my sigh

You wanted to play 

A game meant for two

But what I wouldn't have expected 

Is for you to say that line 

‘No, not with you’

The rotting poet

The pen turns to whisky

The paper turns to pills

The poet's light grows dim

The poems grow darker with this lack of light

The people fear the poet

The poet writes

The pen and paper are used often 

The perfect end to the poem.