the lock on my bedroom door broke a few months ago

the lock on my bedroom door broke a few months ago. it broke last year too. and when my dad reinstalled it, we could tell that the new lock was flimsy and eventually gonna fall apart. and that’s just what happened. the lock broke again and my door has been open for anyone to come in whenever they please for over 6 months. i told my dad i needed to change it several times and, each time, he said that he would. but that's all that i did about it.

this is what my life always felt like. with a pretend boundary that doesn't last and is bound to rupture. then people remember that they can have access to me whenever and pierce through it one by one until it breaks and no longer exists. i get upset but really don't do anything about it. i let them in. i stare blankly at them, basically not existing in the same room. but my body's there. eventually it feels like they're all leeching off whatever's left of me. but i never fix my lock.