Relationship

I feel like ive been written by ville valo man my relationshio is falling apart every second hes been so cold and siatnt its unreal to explain and when i try to talk about it hes telling me im just imagining things cuz as he would say im "sick"  i might be untable but hes words are so strong it physically hurts im not sick im just sad hes not around me at all we go to the same school we see each other everyday but at what cost im literally transparent hes beatfriend is hes ex and im totally obsessing over her cuz shes so effortlessly funny and uncaring just cool litterally down for anything while im always freaking ab shit he also has a lot of friends and recently he started matching with one of them they r matching a ship on two apps and he told me not to worry about it cuz they r matching just cuz that friend wants to make their ex or wtv jealous and i checked that friends account a few mins ago just to see a whole highlight ab my boyfriend being hot and he also posted a story saying that my boyfriend was his significant other and how he would soo date him and things ab them being close and shit and i freaked i have no self control i cant keep going its been like that for almost 4 months we also dated before and then broke up but he was a total different person the first time we dated he was caring and nice he showed a lot of affection we was amazing unfortunately we broke up unexpectedly he broke up w me and then i fell off real bad since then nothing is the same my mental health hasent gotten any better i fear ive gotten worse and he brainwashed himself into changing everything ab himself but i think he did that to himself for the best he knows whats right for him im afraid i cant keep going theres only 3 ppl that i care about and i might dissapoint them one of u is my friend on here Toby if ur reading this im not doing too well and im sorry if i ever disapoint u it might be soon or later but im afraid i might do something its not now tho so dont worry ab me ily