3-10-25

hey. i havent used this site in like half a yea! life's been fucking me deep and hard in the ass and to be honest, most of it's my fault. so, whats happened to me in my life?

• i ran away from home because my mom was being a dick
• i dropped out of school
• moved in with my sister's god-mother for like.. half a year and left on bad terms (at least i think so)
• i turned 18.. not much i can do at that age ill be honest with you
• i beat MGS snake eater.. that was probably 10 hrs of me shitting myself because MGS is lowkey scary (started sons of liberty but opted out after the tanker part)
• and im going for my GED because i failed my previous year in school

i dont know what i want to do with myself. what to do with this insane thing called life. i mean, im still young so i have plenty of time but i just cant. you know?  like.. before, maybe half way into high school, i could actually do shit! i had that drive, that want, the urge to actually do shit that wasnt school work! now i can barely read a book without quitting. i can barely pick up a pencil and draw. i dont know if i have depression or some shit because my healths wrecked and ive basically become a NEET before i even tried joining the labor force. i dont know. and i honestly dont think i ever will. this isnt a suicide note or some shit, im just stuck. might have anhedonia or some shit....