I can't escape this repeating hellhole

It's all the same, everytime.

I lose my talents after being lazy, and i can't control slacking off

My motivation lasts the same time as the time when you start playing a video and an ad appears

i don't understand

i get along so well with somebody, i develop good feelings, i hang out with them often, we share a strong bond

then, then what happens?

they leave with no explanation

there's something wrong with me

very wrong

and it's eating me from the inside out

and i can't do anything about it

i can't understand class

what the teachers say, what they explain, 

it's hard for me to break down everything in my mind

i am not okay

i promise