Why i should be famous *not satire* *fully serious*

Guys pretty please make me famous on everything i have things to prove. here are my reasons why

1. I'm nonchalant and have a lot of aura points 

2. im not cancellable. I pinkie promise to not be a Jimmy Savile type or be racist or anything (cant promise i wont be sexist, men suck)
3. im funny (or i like to think so anyways)

4. im fit.

But yeah this post is fully serious and not a result of a dare so go and check my tt (@yap_c3ntral) pretty please