what life is really like, no filters.

first of all, idk if im depressed or going insane or both.. I just experienced the quantum theory irl so I basically just died but no, got switched to a world where I didn't die and im maybe going to cry because that means that in a different world my parents would be crying rn... sometimes it seems as if im living inside my head, I watch everyone better themselves and have fun while I wait for the day I can complete a small everyday task without crying. how come the second I pull out a piece of gum in class everyone wanna start acting like a little starved homeless victorian child.. anyways I DON'T need to get therapy but everyone is so boring and voices are exhausting, still miss that one boy he's the only one I wouldn't mind talking to.. yea