I believe that this year could possibly be my busiest. I have alot of 'Big' goals, and alot of smaller ones as well. I think starting off with the fact I truly wish to start college this year. I know it will be hard, and I don't really know where I am going to go, or how I am going to do it, or how any of it truly works but, I am determined. "Going to college is useless" I remember hearing all too often from my parents, and it stuck with me. Why should I be contented with their wishes? Perhaps my bitterness of their lifestyle fuels me towards it, either that or pushes me further from them. I believe a Masters in History is my only calling, however we shall see where I end up. I am a surly one, I am not happy "where the money is", only with what makes me happy.

                Another big goal I have is I really want to get my emotions in order. I am not sure I understand myself anymore. My feelings, my bitterness, anger, resentment, suspicion and even hyper-sexuality. I know Ive been broken and had many things happen beyond my control, but I want to fix my view on that. I believe people want to abandon me, but even if that is the case, why should that end things? I feel heightened depression, among many other things, but I hope I can get some type of solace this year, or at least something.

                 A new job! Preferably one that pays way fucking more, so I can actually get many many more goals done.

                 A car, or truck, or hell, even at this point, some skates with rockets on em. I feel guilty accepting as much help as I do, but I don't suppose I have any other choice. A new job needs to come for me to get this.

                 I guess thats really all I can think of right now, anyhow. Until next time ^.^