16 pieces of advice a 16-year-old has to offer

happy soon-to-be friday!!!! i wanted to share some pieces of advice today (as the title suggests); so here are some things i would say to my younger self if she were sitting here with me today <3 turning 17 in a month so it's now or never 

1. a little bit goes a long way: this is for when you have too much work and it gets overwhelming (from me to you, as a chronic procrastinator working to get better). chunk it up and work for a little bit at a time! i've found that a 5-minute timer really helps to just start and keep the ball rolling. remember that making some progress is better than none at all!

2. be comfortable in your own presence: alone does not equal lonely!!!! it's what you make it out to be. i used to find so so so much shame in sitting alone at lunch or doing anything by myself, but i absolutely thrive in it now. if you love spending time with yourself, life gets so much better i promise. of course, don't neglect your relationships and this isn't a free pass to be anti-social, but learn how to have fun by yourself! you are your own forever best friend!!!!

3. try new things: especially things you've always wanted to do, but found fear holding you back. do it scared! it gets better and you don't know how many doors this will open. i've always wanted to do speech and debate, but i was so scared of being horrible at it and just public speaking as a whole--now i wish i started sooner! i met so many new people and i've learned so much. i absolutely adore public speaking a whole lot more now!

4. being bored is good for you: yeah.... being bored is... boring.... but it is so much better than doom scrolling without a purpose and binging shows for hours (guilty!). i find myself so drained and tired after overloading my brain with constant information and it is not worth it. be bored! daydream! let your creative juices flow! stare at a wall! you don't need to be entertained all the time

5. what other people think don't matter: this obviously doesn't apply to an academic setting when you're learning from others, but never ever take people's negative comments about you to heart. they don't know anything about you at all. if you won't take advice from them, why would you care what they think about you? their comments are almost always projections of their own issues and insecurities 

6. change is a blessing: don't hold onto people who want to leave your life, let them. people change, you can grow apart from people because your values and interests don't align anymore and that's okay. there are so many people you haven't met yet! you don't have to stick to what you've always known! not to a dream you once had, a career you once wanted to pursue, not to people you once loved, things you once wanted. change is a beautiful thing--accept it and watch your life transform! 

7. get enough sleep: did you guys know that staying up late is not it... people who don't get enough sleep have higher risks of heart disease, cancers, diabetes, and various other chronic health issues. sleep debt catches up to you... get at least 7-9 hours of sleep each night and you'll perform better on tests, be more focused throughout the day, and (shocker) have a better quality of life. i am pulling all-nighters' biggest hater and i will die on this hill.

8. stop being so negative: what you constantly enforce in your mind will impact your actions and become reality... the only thing negativity will do for you is hold you back. if you don't like something in your life, stop complaining and wallowing in self-pity. change it. not everything is in your control, but you can control how you look at and move forward with a situation. so all in all, just be positive guys! easier said than done obviously, but this may include: writing down what you're grateful for and no more sad songs.... cough mitski cough.... i love her, but her songs make me want to cry every time i listen to them... listen to crack baby guys it's my fav ever

9. praying on other people's downfall is so embarrassing: it screams jealousy and that you clearly lack self confidence. why hope people fail their exams so it makes you look better? i never understood people who thought this way because it just shows you didn't adequately prepare and that you hate seeing others succeed. if you were confident in your own abilities, you wouldn't care if others did poorly or not because you know for sure that you will do great. if you know you're underprepared, own up to it! work to make yourself better and don't shy away from helping others! fearing people will surpass you does not curate healthy relationships. the "i don't have this so you can't either" mindset is the stupidest thing i've ever heard

10. get your priorities straight: please remember this when you decide to clean your room for the 5th time this week instead of sitting down to study. or when you decide to watch a 46 episode c drama during exam week when you know you have the worst self-control ever. or even better when you rewrite notes because you think you're studying instead of focusing on your weakest spots... know what you need to get done and do them asap please. 

11. misunderstandings are okay: use common sense and know when this doesn't apply, but you don't have to waste your energy and time to overexplain yourself to people that clearly never put in the effort to seek out your side of the story. i know you may fear how people perceive you, but again, it's none of your business what goes on in people's heads. let them think what they want. you know it's not true anyway, so protect your peace. out of sight, out of mind. 

12. knowledge is power: i will never understand people who don't take their academics seriously and i don't mean you have to dedicate 24/7 to your studies. you shouldn't--it's not healthy to have your life be revolved around only school. but seeing people that could care less? people that put no effort into anything because "what we're learning is useless anyway." honey, it is a privilege to learn. yeah, you might not use what you learn right now in class years down the road, but you are building other skills that will help you become a stronger critical thinker. you are building your work ethic. and so for this exact reason, you will never catch me using ai for anything. people seriously can't outline, research, or brainstorm on their own? what do you use your brain for? all i have to say is to always try your best no matter what--once you put in the effort, no matter what happens, you're learning and growing. this, i will always believe. 

13. read the news: i was so out of touch a few years ago. i literally did not tune in to anything that was happening around the world. i can't go back to not keeping up with international news... not understanding the state of politics in the U.S. right now honestly sounds like a blessing though, but alas, it is so important to be informed

14. you don't have to stick to your plan: yes, it is okay to skip your pre-planned jog because you just really don't feel like it today. you deserve a break and yes, discipline is amazing and great, but too much will only lead to burnout. balance is key. your day is not ruined because you ate one too many cookies. your day is not ruined because you rotted your morning away. your day is not ruined because you only studied for 2 hours instead of 3. if you planned every living second of your life and stuck to such a rigid schedule all the time, imagine how miserable you would be (and this is coming from the biggest fan of to-do lists and scheduling)

15. say "no" more: you don't have to do what you don't want to. don't be a people pleaser like i once was and make yourself a bigger priority. if they're good people, they will respect your "no." no, you don't have to go to a party you know you won't enjoy being at and no, you are not obligated to go just because they invited you. no, you don't have to be friends or hang out with people that drain you. no, you don't have to give people your homework answers or tell people your test grades. no, you don't have to say you like something when you don't. no, you don't have to agree with something just because everyone else does. no, you shouldn't settle for anything less of what you deserve.

16. you are not behind: you cannot be behind in your own life. yeah it's great and all that people your age may have achieved all these things, but did you ever want to do those things yourself? if not, how on earth are you behind? everyone lives life at their own pace and comparison will do nothing but slow you down because you will find yourself on a path you never intended to step foot on. be in tune with your wants and your goals and keep going. i would be concerned if 8 billion people have the same priorities i have. focus on living a life you want and regrets will never find you.

11:18 p.m.

feb. 27, 2025