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Life be weird AF.
I used to be a good writer. Grammar was immaculate. I got lazy. I honestly
don't know how to do it anymore. I loved writing all kinds of stuff especially poetry. I quickly added sketching to my poetry because I was an artsy little kid. Then, I dropped the writing and was an Artist. I wanted to be an animator and worked hard at it for a while until I
was enveloped by video games. Somewhere in between picked up a guitar. Anyway, Video games is all I did. Dropped out of College because it wasn't working for me, mostly because they didn't have an animation program and I was too poor to go to a school that had one.
Instead, I tried selling my art at a local gallery and it was a success but my crippling Anxiety took over and ruined my life for a little while. you know the usual, "you're not good enough for this" stuff. I went back to video games and discovered Live-streaming which was so amazing but hard for someone who overthinks every little thing. Sooo I quit that too for a while. I tried doing school again, guess what? The Pandemic happened. Of course I dropped out once again. I couldn't handle the world collapsing so I definitely couldn't handle online work. My classes were mostly Art Classes, How does one do that online? Anyway, that's irrelevant. I'm not good at multitasking but I have so many hobbies/dreams/career ideas that it makes me want to explode because I love them all!
Somewhere in between all of this I tried Making an Art Channel on Youtube. it was cool but got old after a while. Then I created a Vlog channel which I still do til today because nothing is better than looking back at old videos of your past. I livestream from time to time if my mind allows it.
Anyway, the point of this is life is so weird.
I'm trying my best to not overthink because I'm going to die either way.
Did I do something embarrassing? Doesn't matter I'll die eventually and no one will remember.
Will I fail again and again? Doesn't matter I'll die eventually no one will remember.
Did I not get dressed up enough? Doesn't matter ill die eventually and it won't matter
Basically I'm trying to wire my mind into doing more and thinking less.
Just like this post.
I was overthinking it 😅
Then I said fuck it no one is gonna read it anyway!
If you're reading this though...ummm hi 🥲
My life has basically been ruined by my own mind. I was my own worst enemy and I'm finally changing that. Better late than never right?
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Plázziibo
I can totally relate! Just like you I have done many projects and have had many jobs in my life. I consider myself a jack of all trades, master of none. Truthfully though looking back and listening to the stories of successful people I have come to realize they all went through this. Tried this, didn't work, tried that, didn't work. For some their original idea worked out and for others they found a new passion. Now, in all truthfulness we may not all become millionaires or come up with an idea that will change the world but! In my point of view, if we can help each other out as much as possible and spend our own time doing something positive that we like doing (even if it's something new every time) I think it is a life well lived and well spent! You are right, we are own worst enemies and it is SO hard because it's an ongoing battle but as long as we keep working on ourselves I think it is a win.
Definitely, As the years pass I just realize even more that we have a short life to live and it matters how we live it only to us. Just gotta stop thinking and start doing. Making the best of any situation along the way! Laughs and memories are all we will remember on our death bed not our Possessions.
by K I M V E E D E E; ; Report