The First Girl I Ever Fell For

The First Girl I Ever Fell For

I liked a girl. It all started in Grade 11, but we’ve known each other since Grade 8. We weren’t that close at first, but over time, we became good friends. And now, here I am—stuck in this mess of feelings I never asked for.

Another girl likes her too. The difference? She actually had the courage to confess and make a move—nothing big, just sending reels and jokes about flirting, since they don’t see each other every day, only during practice. But still, it was something. Fast forward, she confessed, and well… ouch. Moon liked her back.

I wish I had that kind of courage, but I keep thinking about our friendship. I’m scared that if I say anything, I’ll ruin everything. So, I just keep quiet and hope these feelings disappear.

But then, the girl who confessed suddenly cut ties with Moon, saying she still had feelings for her ex. It hurt to see Moon sad, but at the same time, I felt a small glimmer of hope. Maybe this was my chance. Maybe, just maybe, if I stayed by her side, things would change. But I never made a move—I’m too much of a coward for that. And to make things worse, Moon only sees me as a sister. Ouch.

And just when I thought the girl was out of the picture, she came back. After weeks of ignoring Moon—while giving flowers to her ex, by the way—she suddenly decided to talk to her again. And Moon? She just let it happen, like nothing ever happened, like she wasn’t just abandoned. And today? Moon texted me, telling me they were together again, just hanging out, listening to music.

I feel hopeless. That’s why I’m here, pouring all of this out. This isn’t even my story—it’s theirs. And I’m just here, watching from the sidelines. I just noticed that everything I wrote was about them.

Moon and I are really close… so why couldn’t it be me?

I keep hoping this feeling will go away. I try so hard to move on, but every time we’re together, it’s impossible. Her smile, her eyes, the way she laughs—it just pulls me back in.

I don’t know what to do. I guess I’ll just keep watching from the side, hoping that one day, this won’t hurt as much.

"Unrequited love is the infinite curse of a lonely heart."