Maladaptuve Daydreamer who wants to become a writer

Ive had active imagination since a young age, cuz life sucked so bad i had to make up new reality for me lol. Anyways ive always wanted to write it all down but i CANT  id write a few pages for a few days and be embarrassed af and delete it , i cant even let myself be freely cringy even in my own head. Ive tried to force myself once and finished a fanfic and published it but it just... so damned embarrassing i know no one knows who i am but UGHHHH THE VOICES THE VOICES... help how can i kill the voices also how to kill my adhd i cant for the life of me focus on ONE scenario **help or no help ots ok it just rant blahhh**