Jurassic Park and Dinosaur Revolution if they were collectible cards

Well, if I didn't have anything to talk about I wouldn't write this, it would be stupid. But hey, since I always have something to talk about (and not always about anthropomorphic dinosaurs), if I had a coin for every time someone decides to make a franchise with dinosaurs literally FORGETTING that they are animals...I would have 2 coins, Jurassic Fight Club (the most salvageable) and Dinosaurs Attack

                                                      Dino- Wait, what?

Why lie, I didn't grow up at the time when these collectible cards were distributed, but I really found it interesting to talk about these. I have several uncles who spent their time collecting anything that seemed interesting to them (albums, vinyl, VHS, stamps (yes, I really have a family that does it)), and of course, collectible cards, like the Marvel Pepsi cards and the most curious one, Mars Attack and Dinosaurs Attack.

Around the beginning of the 60s, a series of collectible cards called Mars Attack created by Topps became popular, and surprisingly the production series of these cards still exists (although at the hands of fans). Well, skipping several years, arriving at the beginning of the 90s, Topps wanted to repeat this success with Dinosaurs Attack, and although Mars Attack would have had a crudeness and violence similar to Dinosaurs Attacks, I feel that with this one it was clear that Topps simply wanted to put blood on collectible cards FOR KIDS.

Although technically I don't know if they were for children or a more adolescent audience, the Topps executives were CRAZY to agree to mass produce cards as bloody as a gore video, and if you don't believe me, search yourselves for Dinosaurs Attack on Google, because I'm sure the platform wouldn't allow me to put it here, hell, I had to search for 10 minutes for an acceptable image for this blog! Returning to the topic, I say that this was for children mainly because it came with five cards, a sticker and chewing gum (which is honestly worth it just for the gum), the cards, as I said before, are more than anything disturbing, I can't imagine a father giving money to his son to buy something on the way to school and coming back with an image of two pachycephalosaurus devouring a person in great detail (No, I didn't have the wrong dinosaur).

Now moving on to the history of these cards (yes, it has history), we follow a scientist who I will call for no specific reason Professor Utonium, he wanted to bring the dinosaurs back to life (if you ask me, I would have been better off looking for mosquitoes in amber) by making a machine that scans and spits out what it scans on the planet. Well, surprise, that thing doesn't work and brings dinosaurs to today's world. After an ENDLESS number of deaths, the professor has a vision in which a monster (Sauria I think his name was) tells him that all the dinosaurs are DEMONIZED by a SATAN DINOSAUR (WHAT THE FU-). So, he returns to where the temporary photocopier was and wants to reverse everything, but the DINOSAUR SATAN catches him and takes him to his nightmare world and one of his assistants has to do all the work, returning the dinosaurs to their time and killing the Utonian professor in the process (although well, he died from being in the SAME HELL).

If the story seemed bizarre to you, now let's move on to the cards. Look, it seems that the guy who drew these thought that all dinosaurs were CARNIVORES. Parasaurolofus eating children on a school bus, Triceratops killing a couple with its horns, a pair of Pachycephalosaurus DESRIPPING AND HALVING a person, and an Iguanodon breaking down a roller coaster to eat the people on it. And we're not talking about the GROTESQUE designs, which yes, some series like Dinosaur Revolution had, but this series was a PARODY or Mockumentary, I think it was called, about dinosaurs (which makes it passable), but don't give me this, I understand that they want to sell but putting an animal which was literally a big cow attacking a couple is TOO MUCH. Look, it would seem like a Hater talking like that, but really the collection is...interesting in its own way, I mean yes, it may not have been the parents' pleasure to see how their son had a collectible card with a tyrannosaurus stepping on a poor dog, but I guess it worked (in some strange way). And we don't have the current versions or well, its "revival" like Dinosaurs Attack vs Mars attacks (yes, that exists), which honestly seems more interesting and digestible to me thanks to the art, and this was not the last time that the dinosaurs got together with the dinos, they also did it in another series of letters that was Dinosaurs and Mars attacks, which although there is not as much information or letters on the internet, the change and quality of these is noticeable.

Well, I couldn't say that I dislike it but I wouldn't say that I love it either, Dinosaurs Attacks is one of those collections that if you know that a friend owns you, you stay away from them for a while (or they become more friends, it depends on the person). But above all that, I feel like it's a good look back and it was a surprise that I'm not grateful for but I don't hate having had either.

This collection is better than: The Soccer World Cup albums.