turning 20

I recently turned 20, to be precise, on February 8th.

As a kid, I always imagined that by this time I would be a beautiful woman who looks like a model, who is put together, living the absolute best life, but I'm nothing like that. I'm chubby, I don't go out that much, I cry myself to sleep more than I would like, and I don't consider myself a beautiful woman, I think I'm more like a stupid teen because, after two years of lockdown, my brain still doesn't process that I'm an adult.

Not everything is bad, though. On this birthday, I realized how loved I am by those around me and how fake others can be, and that's okay because it makes me even more grateful for those wonderful people around me.

I'm willing to become who I really want to be, that woman who I dreamt of, and I'm still dreaming, of being. I want to be the best version of myself.

I know that my family and friends won't see this, but thank you so much for spoiling me with gifts that show how much you know me, thank you for spending my birthday with me and making it such a special day. I hope I can do the same for you all in the future.

I never imagined I would get to live past 15, so getting to this point is surprising for me, but it's not as bad as I thought, ofc I have my ups and downs, but that's life after all.

Thank you Xdinary Heroes for making this banger, I'm sick of the fakes too.