My history with intermittently identifying as aroace

Back when i identified as a demigirl/agender/genderfluid (but still generally perceived myself as a girl) i was always very against the idea of romance and relationships - i found myself thinking 'i would only like romance if i were a different person' and then translated that as being some form of aroace.
i identified as demi-aroace for about 2 years before realising that i was a trans man and then a lot of stuff began to click into place for me - i wasnt aroace, i was just a gay transman who didnt like the idea of straight relationships because i wanted to be in a gay one, as a man myself. 

i also identified as a lesbian for a while when i was first looking into the lgbt community and once again i think this was for a similar reason, i struggled to find guys attractive because i didnt want to be in a straight relationship with them, it was only when i started imagining myself as a guy in the relationship that i started to understand my identity more than before.

now this is not to say that all aroace people are actually trans and don't realise it, some people are just aroace and that's fine and perfectly valid of course.

honestly a film that really gets this concept for me is I Saw The TV Glow. It's a film that's about being trans and the main character Owen gets asked at one point if they "like girls" or "like boys", to which Owen responds with something along the lines of "I don't know... I think i like TV shows" which a lot of people saw as Owen being aroace or somewhat aligned with aromanticism and being asexual,
however this scene really struck me as Owen not liking the idea of being a man in a relationship and so perceiving that as just not being into romance (which is almost exactly what i went through when i was younger, just from the perspective of being a transMAN instead of being a transwoman).
(also it's perfectly fine if you see Owen as being aroace, the film covers a lot of queer struggles and i definitely think can be interpreted how you want it to be)

I would for sure recommend I Saw The TV Glow to pretty much anybody but trans people specifically, for me it's one of those films that never really leaves you after you've watched it, plus im a sucker for cool looking films and their are so many frames and scenes that are ridiculously visually appealing.

so yeah, are there any other trans people on this site who have gone through similar stuff?

idk maybe this was a rant too personal for this site but i think it's interesting to talk about