"date to marry" is a little extreme.

This may offend some people who believe in the 'date to marry' concept and i apologize in advance if this is misunderstood. This is my personal opinion on the subject, so if this seems like going against ur opinion, feel free to just skip the blog :P

so okay, im currently 16 years old, and i have been in a few relationships. One of my ex believed in dating to marry and at that time i was not as mature as i am now, so i agreed with him. But we were really young and committing to someone at such a young age seemed scary to me, but nevertheless i stayed with him and promised marriage. But deep down i knew that i cannot give him what he wants obviously- cuz not many middle school relationships last and on top of that i was dating an immature teenage boy who restricted me from talking to any other boys (even my cousin brother), from hugging and goofing around with my frds, from staying too close to my dog (cuz he was male), from posting myself or even using a picture of my face in my pfp- all of this was overwhelming for me and i wanted to break up but i felt very guilty cuz of the promise i made about "forever". And cuz he knew i wouldnt leave, he took advantage of the situation to act however he wanted. He always made sexual comments abt my body, and would always ask me to send n4de pictures to him becuz "i was gonna marry him anyway". He seeked constant validation from me which i was willing to give but sometimes it js felt like he was pressuring me. And he would always say he loved me only after dating me for a few days, and i would say it back but again, deep down i knew i didnt love him- as there is a huge difference between crushing on someone, liking someone, and loving someone. And i knew for sure that i didnt love that guy, and i only liked him to an extent, it felt like i was lying to him constantly. He got this mentality from insta reels and would take them super seriously- he would shame people who broke up or who had hooked up before marriage. He based his entire opinion on reels which pissed me off the most. And apart from everyone else he told me i shouldnt be a feminist cuz women had everything they want and now feminists only want to dominate males or smth. He had the mindset of a man in the 1900s oml. okay back to topic,

I feel like dating should be a process where u get to know each other and become familiar with the other person. It shouldnt be something u should rush into- u should know for sure that u love the person before telling them, but that doesnt mean u ll marry every person u love.. sometimes things might not work out- and it might seem alot for something a 16yr old should be talking about but i've been in relationships that made me fear actually committing to a person. Cuz sometimes the person u date might not be the one so u wont end up marrying them, which makes me think the whole concept is a little extreme, and im not trying to attack anyone that thinks u should date to marry, like i said this is my own personal opinion. Dating should be fun where u meet different types of people and see whos best for u. My mom compares it with ice cream flavors lmao ToT. Only after liking the person ur dating u get into a relationship with them, and only after liking the person ur in a relationship with u marry them.

But anyway, thats all i wanted to say. Marriage is a very distant topic from dating so yep.