First Official Entry to SpaceHey

Hi! I'm Septe. I'm 21 years old. I found this app through... probably YouTube or something. I don't actually know what to do here. I think I'll use this as a vent space or pondering space from time to time. I've been lonely for most of my life, I never managed to form friendships or relationships with people, I was bullied or set apart from people sometimes. I don't know if I've started to lose emotion or something but I barely feel anything but sadness sometimes. Now I interact with new people and don't feel any warmness, most of my actions are just pleasantries or fake actions, I don't wish any harm upon anyone, I just don't feel anything, not sure if this is normal. 

I tend to treat everyone "nicely," in order to "fit in." My first interactions at my new job have been me overhearing people call me a weirdo. I felt sadness or depression for a day, then went back to work the next day. I do think about this every single day, it has made me feel distrust for people more. 

I don't know what I intend to do here besides posting and browsing blogs, let's see what the future holds if anything.