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the misconstrued public view on sex

this isn't for anyone who isn't going to look at it from a mature perspective, nonetheless, this post may delve into some personal things that are a little too personal for some folks, so trigger warning: sorta vivid descriptions of sex & criticism on hook-up culture


and edit: sex is amazing i love it so dont get it twisted

     i genuinely feel like the entire view of sex is wrong. people like to say it's gross, or that it's scary, but it's really misunderstood in a way. let me preface this by saying: there's different kinds of sex. there's high-school-party-drunk-kinda-fuckin, and then there's intimate love-making. and i feel like it's very important to know the difference. 

    i feel like "fucking" is what most people's minds immediately go to when they hear about sex. this kind of sex is like the stuff you do out of straight feeling. the kinda sex you have when you hook-up with somebody. the kinda sex you have at a party and/or with someone completely random or that you don't know very well. i feel like this is the kind of sex that gets a bad rep. it's risky, it's likely unsanitary, and it just creates drama. this kind of sex is the kind that doesn't emit much emotion as it does pleasure, and that's it's primary purpose. nine times out of ten, this kind of sex is had by freaky ass teens who just wanna get their parts wet. there's a sense of immaturity that ties in with this kind of sex when you look at it in it's true light, and it's definitely looked down upon for a reason.

     although, sex can also be a very intimate thing. this is the kind where you get two people who feel very strongly for eachother--and i'm talking about actual love, not hornyness--and when they have the right time and place, this kind of sex can be so intimate. it likely starts off with a little foreplay, and definitely safety first. keep the rubber on folks!! and when it happens, it's hot and heavy. there's no rush to it, it's as if you and this other person are the same being sharing this intense love for eachother, and nothing else in the world matters in that moment rather than proving to this person that you love them. with how comfortable you have to be with someone to be able to, #1, show them your body and be comfortable with them touching it, and #2, being comfortable enough to actually engage in this action. it feels mature, and as long as you know what you're doing, there's little to no risk. and the feeling afterwards is heavenly. especially when you get the chance to just lay down with your person, both out of breath and exhausted, being able to embrace eachother and recharge that energy by just getting comfortable and having that lingering pleasure is just an otherworldly feeling. it's mature, it's insanely intimate, and it makes you feel like the most powerful person in the world.

     one of the main reasons i think our view of sex is misguided is that we often conflate these two types of sex, or worse, prioritize the first kind over the second. we live in a culture where casual hookups and one-night stands are normalized, and even glorified, while meaningful intimacy and emotional connection are seen as old-fashioned or boring. but what if we flipped this script? what if we started valuing intimacy and connection over fleeting pleasure? i believe that when we do, we'll start to see sex in a new light - as a powerful tool for building relationships, fostering trust, and creating deep emotional bonds.

moreover, by recognizing the difference between these two types of sex, we can start to break down some of the shame and stigma that surrounds sex. we can stop judging people for having casual sex, while also encouraging them to prioritize their safety and well-being. and we can start to celebrate intimate love-making as a beautiful and meaningful expression of human connection.

ultimately, it's time for us to rethink our attitudes towards sex and intimacy. by acknowledging the complexity and nuance of human desire, we can create a more compassionate and inclusive conversation around sex - one that values both pleasure and intimacy, and recognizes the beauty of human connection in all its forms.



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𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓶𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓵𝓮𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

   𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓶𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓵𝓮𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔's profile picture

I totally agree with you I feel like some people mix up these two things most of the time and adults too,I think that its important to be safe and to give ADVICE to the person instead of judging them even tho as a Catholic casual sex is off limits for me and the rest like me, I don't see the reason to JUDGE a person for having casual sex but rather to help them and talk to them about safety and of course how there won't really be passion in causal/hook ups but with a person you truly love and care for it will feel different and more passionate,romance ,etc. but at the end of the day I think people should have sex with a more passionate feeling rather then doing it to "get it over with" or being peer-pressured into just doing it I think sex is when you get to be one with the person you know in your heart and mind you love and not just doing it with a random person you barely.


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YES THIS!!!

so glad to see people on here can agree on a topic as sensitive as this :)

by dadrockenthusiast; ; Report

𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓶𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓵𝓮𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

   𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓶𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓵𝓮𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔's profile picture

I totally agree with you I feel like some people mix up these two things most of the time and adults too,I think that its important to be safe and to give ADVICE to the person instead of judging them even tho as a Catholic casual sex is off limits for me and the rest like me, I don't see the reason to JUDGE a person for having casual sex but rather to help them and talk to them about safety and of course how there won't really be passion in causal/hook ups but with a person you truly love and care for it will feel different and more passionate,romance ,etc. but at the end of the day I think people should have sex with a more passionate feeling rather then doing it to "get it over with" or being peer-pressured into just doing it I think sex is when you get to be one with the person you know in your heart and mind you love and not just doing it with a random person you barely.


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emillia's noose

emillia's noose's profile picture

fully agree 🙌🙌

i think our view of sex in our society is heavily misguided

when e hear about it we tend to assume the first one and i do believe that to be because of how popular it is

i mean it's been popular for like almost all of history
(i remember there even being a bible story about it and like thats from first testament so thats old)

but sex ultimately for me and i'd think a lot of others is that second one
the kind where even after you "finish" it's not really over because that kind of intimacy stays with you as you are there for the other person same as they are to you (i swear to god do not look at any of my bulletins that say "men" i beg you)

i honestly really really like how you catagorized it as fucking and sex because i do think that they are two different things

the first one is a drug it's impulse but the second one is almost a for m of personal art shared in intimacy and feelings of mutual love

fucking is very much like a drug and it's kidna funny to me because we mainly see young adults do the first one with meaningless sex

and in our society its also mainly the younger adults who are more prone to taking drugs or so is the stigma
and so its almost like the fucking is a part of that drug culture

cause at the end of the day it is very much emotionless

very cool blog btw 🙌🙌


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thank you so much for this feedback!! i really like the comparison of fucking being like a drug because it really is, and when sex is done right it really is like a form of art

p.s. too late i already read your bulletins

by dadrockenthusiast; ; Report

hell yeah

(on bulletins) oh no

by emillia's noose; ; Report

although there isn't really a way to do sex "wrong" it's just about what is generally like more grotesque

its basically pop music. emotionless (lol)

by emillia's noose; ; Report

real asf (esp the pop music take)

i guess it really is different for everyone, bc im sure there are people out there who get that emotion from a hookup, i js think it will never compare to having sex with the same person consistently and building that connection with them that js gets better after each steamy session

by dadrockenthusiast; ; Report

in conclusion basically the same take as i had on maturity in my blog lmao

people be doing they stuff and as long as they happy and have consent it's alright

by emillia's noose; ; Report

Sneeze

Sneeze's profile picture

yes i agree, there is a difference. personally i'm waiting, first off because i feel like I'm too immature rn for that and second because there isn't anyone i feel that way toward. I feel like people don't put enough thought into it. I get that its a personal thing but i think people should know what kind of person they want to sleep with. idk this is just my opinion though.


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no i definitely agree. if it doesn't feel right or if you have any kind of doubts whatsoever, don't do it. because if you do it when you aren't ready, you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

by dadrockenthusiast; ; Report

tamita~°•☆

tamita~°•☆'s profile picture

Sex is so complex. Even though, yes, there are different types of sex, I feel like even the intimate exchange differs from person to person. Now, I haven't done it with others to share any personal experiences, but when you talk about it enough with others, you start to learn that preferences are unique to that person. Sort of like talent, or intelligence, intimacy defines people differently. That is why hookup culture isn't exactly for everyone, or even vice versa. At the end of the day kids, just sit with you partner and talk about you preferences, needs and boundaries for the best results.


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i agree with this, it's definitely a lot more complex than most people realize. my point is though, hook-up culture sucks and nobody should do it because hooking up doesn't even closely compare to genuine intimacy

by dadrockenthusiast; ; Report

yeah as you say hookup culture isn't for everyone and i honestly think it's the same as it's always been

the older generation mocking the younger generation lmao

because we almost have this like zoomed in perspective on it where we say "ag all the youngens wanna just party and have sex needlessly"

by emillia's noose; ; Report