should i use spacehey or friendproject? and thoughts on digital ecosystem

Posted this on friendproject earlier, unsure if that website is dead or not, so here it is again on spacehey. if you see this, let me know- is spacehey more active than friendproject? 

So, Tiktok is no longer available in the US. It was kind of surreal to be scrolling in the app realizing I wouldn’t be able to use it shortly, then getting the weird message about the law and how Tiktok is hopeful that Trump will help them reach a compromise. What world is this? Not the one I remember. 

The ban being on the horizon had me feeling feelings I didn’t realize I would feel, like almost like I was anticipitating the withdrawal. I had already been thinking about my digital ecosystem and my relation to The Screen for a while. Thats part of why I opened this account (and a Spacehey account- same username if you want to add me on there, but I don’t think any one is reading this, lol). 

I moved back in with my parents so my feelings of nostalgia and yearning for the past are in some ways peaking right now. I started graduate school this month and set up a little desk in a spare bedroom so I can do work and school stuff comfortably. It reminds me of growing up, having a computer room. I miss that feeling of being so fascinated and enraptured by new technology. These days I just feel kind of burnt out with most of it. Espescially when it comes to That Damn Phone. That Damn Phone is something I am always on (don’t ask a woman her age or an internet user their screen time) and I spent the majority of the final two years at my last job on Tiktok. Now that the app is gone, I find myself opening my phone and hovering my finger over the place it used to be (because I took it off the Home Screen, lol), realizing I can’t open Tiktok, and looking for another app to scroll on. Usually this will be Youtube or their Shorts. A suitable alternative, honestly. And to be really honest? I kind of don’t want to redownload Tiktok even if it does become legal to use again. 

I miss the days of dedicated media devices! I miss when the computer was a place you would go, not this ever present time sucking box of tricks. I really considered getting a dumb phone for a while (as opposed to a smart phone), but I just-

Sorry for the digression but literally as I’m writing this I get a text from my aunt that Tiktok is back online. HAH! What the hell. I might still keep it off my home screen. My thoughts are still in my head. 

Anyway. I’ve been thinking about dumb phones for a while now. My ideal dumb phone would still have some features. Namely, GPS functions and a QWERTY keyboard. Its kind of surprising how uncommon those features are in dumbphones, especially the qwerty keyboard. I guess the makers assume that the folks buying dumbphones aren’t interested in texting, but its my bread and butter of communication at this point. Whatsapp would be nice too, to retain some groupchats I’m in. I just miss phones with buttons sometimes. And I miss mp3 players! My iPod was my JAM back in the day. I had a green iPod mini when they first came out, not very mini, actually quite a chunky device compared to what we have now. But it was the sh*t! I had a few more iPods after that one died- because they always die. 

F***ing Apple! I had my 2015 Macbook for a solid 4 years of college before it promptly died in a way they claim is unfixable. And apparently its my fault for not backing up to the Cloud. Well you know what? Now I don’t need the Cloud. I have a gaming laptop (and the necessary external fan), a VPN, and an external hardrive! F*** you! As for those memories trapped in my bricked Macbook... well, maybe they should just stay there. College wasn’t a great time for me. 

Paying for Spotify is cool and all but I think it’s way cooler to download music on the internet. The way it was meant to be consumed. And burn CDs for your car. This is the way I imagined myself interfacing with the digital world as an adult. When the iPhone first came out it was revolutionary to have all this functionality in one place. But now I just feel so tired of looking at my phone. There are some people I like being in constant contact with, but a lot of the whole constant-contact thing is a total drag. You mean my work boss can text me on my day off? (Not even going to go into that one time I caught a stray for letting the office know I had COVID in case they wanted to get tested. No good deed, dude.) My mentally ill friend in the hospital can call me every day to let me know every update on his condition when he should really be focused on, idk, getting well? (I wanna be there for you bro, I’m just overwhelmed.) 

All I can really say is that every since I woke up in the middle of the night to seeing that Trump won the 2016 election, life has felt like an alternate, absurd timeline that I don’t recognize. Jamais f***ing vu.