Figuring yourself out

I'm not as used to blogging as I was when Tumblr was still the biggest thing lol. Funnily enough, I'm more comfortable journaling now than when I was young and wanted so bad to have a diary but never got to be consistent about it. Anyway, back to topic.

Life's funny. I have to keep unlearning and relearning stuff about myself just to figure out who I am. Maybe the most sane advice regarding this rings true now more than ever: maybe I don't always have to be improving myself all the time. Maybe "healing" has slowly turned into just another trauma response, and maybe it gets to a point where too much improvement too often is also detrimental.

I keep wanting to be visible, show up in as many places as I can, but I just don't know what I'll do once I'm there. For example, I'm here, and I'm barely active, and yet I still wanna be on Bluesky or Instagram, but I don't know what to post. And if being random is excusable, I still don't really know how to "be random". I guess I just don't know myself that well. But I don't know where to start getting to know myself and how.

I may be asking the wrong questions, or maybe I'm not supposed to be. Maybe questioning is also a misstep. Maybe a misstep is needed. Maybe that's just what life is.

Here's me being random. That's all for today.