Life

I notice that I been unmotivated for things I want to do and things I need to do…and days where I just want to lay down on my bed forever but in my mind I don’t because I want to do something or see something with friends or something but I know even if I’m with them I will still feel lonely and feel like I’m annoying them…when I text my friends I don’t know what else to say to them but I can talk to them face to faces but not in text which is weird because I talk with friends but only in person…I feel afraid that I will lose all my friends once I graduate high school because not many of my friends text me first but then I again I don’t text them first also sometimes since I just watch videos and do whatever…I feel like if I text them I will be annoying to them like dog who wants attention…I hate this feels on being lonely when in reality I sometimes like being lonely but also don’t at the same time…I feel like I can’t be myself or I will be annoying people and be called weird and be bullied again like in elementary…I wonder if everyone feels like this without even knowing it