1/14/24 that one time I made hot chocolate explode

one day last year (yes this was VERY recent) I woke up and went "man, I want some hot cocoa"

this wouldn't be a problem usually, just pop some milk in the microwave and bam, but I got up, and the first thing I saw outside of my room, and thought that I could easily use a kettle to heat it up

issue #1 is that I thought I was smart enough to USE a kettle, but issue #2 came when I couldnt FIND the kettle, so I'm looking around the entire small kitchen, a kitchenette would be an understatement, I could reach the sink FROM my room in that place, dead serious

I look around, and I find THIS (we didn't have the full coffee maker, just the pot)

MYYYY stupid ass went "yeah... that'll work" AND PUT THE WHOLE COFFEE POT ONTO THE BURNER, AND PUT THE MILK IN AND WAITED

I sat my ass down right next to the stove, watching this fucking crime unfold in my kitchen as I hear POPPING. I lean in, like "woahh, is it done yet"
the second I look at the pot, the whole fucking corpse LAUNCHES off the stove and shoots milk across the entire kitchen, shotgunning lactose all over the wall and stove, as i stand there in fucking HYSTERICS LIKE I GOT SHOT

yeah uh tldr make sure your kettle doesn't say "McCafe" it, and never let me touch a stove without guidance