I don't know how to cope with my broken arm anymore

Captive in a soporific concrete cage
Reflecting upon an imminent surgery
I lied in pain yet remained sage
Wishing it would all end in a hurry

I had already accepted my fate
Stoic dreams and rosy ambitions
Of that promised coveted date
When I will flee this nation

But once back in class
I met cold scornful gazes 
I navigate all these mazes
Then end up an unclubbable outcast

There goes my health
Farewell to my chances
I lost all muscle 
And I cant practice my dances

When I was stressed or felt anxious
A run or work-out would nix my trances
Blissful serotonin pumping through my veins
Replaced by antidotes preventing my faint

No appetite to fend off my inanition
So I'm becoming an erudite in communication
I obsessively scour Wikipedia till dawn
Pronouncing words and studying allophones

Perhaps this will fill my phenomenological void
Since my only connection is with my android
I dont know who to blame anymore
I take my meds and do my chores
Yet all escapism inevitably fails
When I remember my bones are attached by nails
 .14/1/25 4:18am