In my heart. 💐❤♥

I wish I could change for the better, save myself before everyone else. silly old me in the corner, sobbing her eyes out over something everyone else considers so stupid. but is it so stupid to feel? to know that I can't help it or change who I am, nor do I want to. is it because I care too much, but when others care I don't care enough? I will never meet the standards but I like who I am. I hate how I look, but it's out of my control. my personality and interests, my talents are my holy grail. my father, son and holy spirit. I couldnt give a shit about society and it's cruel world, the purest of animals are those who deserve the love. I have lots of people I love, lots of people I look up to inside but they'll never know, and I'll never show. celebrities and crushes, every person I hold to high respect. though my family could disregard my feelings, and I couldn't include them in my emotions. I just want to feel, the way I am meant to feel. but is this eternal rain cloud all there is to life? will I ever walk away and end up okay..? I listen to music and I watch movies more than the average person because they are the only things that bring me happiness. friends are futile and abandon you anyway, but my heart is filled of roses and lilies, for every song I like a new one blossoms.