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Category: Writing and Poetry

💌 ride monologue - how dear it is to me


i. lana del rey - ride (monologue) ᥫ᭡

"I was in the winter of my life, and the men I met along the road were my only summer.
At night I fell asleep with visions of myself, dancing and laughing and crying with them.
... my memories of them were the only things that sustained me, and my only real happy times.
I was a singer - not a
famous one,
I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet, but upon an unfortunate series of events saw those dreams dashed and divided like a million stars in the night sky that I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken.
But I didn't really mind because I knew that it takes getting everything you ever wanted, and then losing it to know what true freedom is.

When the people I used to know found out what I had been doing, how I'd been living, they asked me why - but there's no use in talking to people who have home.
They have no idea what it's like to seek safety in other people - for home to be wherever you lay your head.
I was always an unusual girl.
My mother told me I had a chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality; just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide and as wavering as the ocean...
And if I said I didn't plan for it to turn out this way I'd be lying...
Because I was born to be the other woman.
Who belonged to no one, who belonged to everyone.
Who had nothing, who wanted everything, with a fire for every experience and an obsession for freedom that terrified me to the point that I couldn't even talk about it, and pushed me to a nomadic point of madness that both dazzled and dizzied me.
Every night I used to pray that I'd find my people, and finally I did on the open road.
We had nothing to lose, nothing to gain, nothing we desired anymore, except to make our lives into a work of art.
Live fast. Die young. Be wild. And have fun.

I believe in the country America used to be.
I believe in the person I want to become.
I believe in the freedom of the open road.
And my motto is the same as ever:
"I believe in the kindness of strangers. And when I'm at war with myself I ride, I just ride."
Who are you?
Are you in touch with all of your darkest fantasies?
Have you created a life for yourself where you can experience them?
I have. I am fucking crazy.
But I am free."


when i heard this monologue for the first time at 14, i knew instantly that this is what life was supposed to mean for me. i was completely enamoured by the way lana expressed the freedom we really have in this life; to be as reckless, bold and careless as we can while we can still see, hear, breathe and feel. 

of course being "crazy" comes at a price, but isn't that the mutually accepted expense we pay to grasp the beauty in existence? living will always be hard, but it will always be beautiful even with hardships and consequences. beauty lives in pain. beauty exists in moments that feel like heaven really is on earth. beauty can be found in working your way up from hitting rock bottom. beauty is everywhere and life is a work of art when you make it into one.

what else? i just absolutely love how she wrote about finding comfort in strangers. i truly believe that every person you encounter is just another micro-fiber, you yourself included, of something so much greater. we are all one, across the world with the same beating hearts. let's all take care of eachother.

and lastly, i just like how her writing style is. it sounds romantic to me.

nothing in this life is ours, things come and go, so savour the taste of it in your mouth as passionately as you can.


sorry this entry sucks i just wanted to test this out :P


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