How's my life been...

Hi! I don't know why am I saying how's my life been even I barely have friends in here ...

I'm totally unloveable </3 also about my body and appearance I'm so ugly like litteraly that whenever I scroll on social media I sometimes admire people's faces and the wish I have their beauty and also in Myspace too lol .. when I see someone pfp as their faces I really admire them... They're so cool.. I wanna have an alternative style but I just don't have the body and face for it... 

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Friends ♡ 

About my loneliness, I've been lonely since I was in grade 1 but I didn't realize it lol... Yes I have friends but barely and I get replaced easily, in grade 5 was the time where I realized that I'm lonely because of my appearance lol .. well in grade 5 I did have friends but we're not in contact anymore.. also I was heavily bullied till now, and in grade 3 I have my best friend where we would chat and have calls together but she replaced me and became popular and same for my best friend in grade 6, actually we've been friends for 3 years but I guees friends don't last long </3 I should have expected it because she's so beautiful.. we really had a good friendship but didn't last long and soon replaced me.. now my best friend in grade 5 is what I hate the most she's a h0e she dates a bunch of ppl and cheat with them and uses me because I'm "smart" (I'm actually not I'm only smart at English sometimes.) and how many friends I have irl? Only one and that Best friend is my only friend and also my first friend she's been my friend since grade 1 which we've been friends for 7-8 years<3 I love her so much. 

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Family ♡

Lol it's so bad that I'm included too ... So about my stepmom she really hates me like she would move around aggressively with me and not also me but she traumatized my autistic little brother I didn't know how she did it but I just knew he was because he would come to me when shes near him (also my brother only speaks gibberish I don't know what type of autism it is) and sometimes I have to admit... I hit him and because I was influenced by my dad and my anger issues and I knew that wasn't an excuse so I've been trying to be a better sister by bringing him outside and eat, lettin him watch things... But sometimes I wish I could've been a better brother, son, friend, boyfriend... I really hate my tw0 fac3d stepmom sometimes I don't wanna call her a stepmom because she's barely one.

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