im tired of this shit

WHY THE FUCK DID THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN?? I'M ALWAYS TRYING TO CHANGE MYSELF FOR PEOPLE TO LIKE ME YET IT DOESN'T DO SHIT. I'VE BEEN IN SEVEN RELATIONSHIPS AND NONE OF THEM WERE GOOD, THE ONLY GOOD ONE I HAD GOT CUT SHORT ALL BC ____ BROKE UP WITH ME BC HE GOT A CRUSH ON SOME OTHER GUY. HOW DID I FIND OUT YOU MAY ASK? THROUGH A FUCKING TIKTOK VIDEO. I'VE HAD MY FEELINGS PLAYED WITH, IVE BEEN USED, IVE BEEN LIED TO, AND WORST OF ALL CHEATED ON, AND MORE. MY VERY FIRST ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP WASN'T EVEN REAL, THE GIRL I DATED THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY WHEN SHE KNEW I LIKED HER. IM SO TIRED OF THIS BULLSHIT. i want someone to fucking love me the same way i love them, is that so damn hard to ask for???