rambles/slight rant

Aaa I love the internet so much lol

 https://youtu.be/sf5y62Nj-W8?si=o6bNyXQ7Cz2mSFP5

 https://youtu.be/JALbemLw3G4?si=7fJexxROZ5VlUoH7

:3

Kinda rant vent here>

Going to see an irl friend tmrw I havent seen them in awhile agh it'll also be my first time having real food in forever I hope it goes well they are my friend but im rly nervous and sometimes they try to give me advice their therapist gives them but it's stuff u can't do without 1 a solid support system in place and 2 stuff for them not for me they honestly don't know me super well we rarely talk untill were in person idk I hope it goes well I normally get to get high when I hang out with them so theirs that lol :'3 idk > do like hanging out with them and ik they mean well but ik alot about mental health ive genounly studied it alot of my life and helped people alot till I started isolating and I just dont have a support system/ I have been trying to work on myself but one of their advice was that I need to force myself to do stuff but the thing is 1 that's dangerous to do without a support system eith how bad my issues I have (I dont wanna go into detail( and ive actually tried it b4 because I had to and it made me alot worse have a rly rly bad breakdown :'3 and just other stuff and like it'd be one thing if they just gave advice but they like...keep going and arguing with me abt it till I have to go I to depth about my issues and the fact that it's not possible and entirely like explain everything as to why and just it makes me really uncomfortable and stressed out....I already dont have any irk friends so when I hang out with them its the last thing iw ant to be doing...idk bleh and like from how they talk its obvious they don't actually know what they're talking about but still trying to tell me I have to do it, that's not how things work eso when it's advice your therapist gave for you , our situations and issues are vastly different and I feel bad cuz ik they just wanna help...but I rly try so hard to nicely drop it b4 I have to just be blunt abt it idk....