temporary and feeling

what’s it like to be 

to live in a moment not thinking what if it’s the last whats it like to be steady on the ground you walk on

I want to have the need to feel the connection they all say they feel in the shitty books they make and fill the shit covered young adults section at a bookstore

I want I want I want

I want to crack my ribs open on the pavement and dig through all the trash and sorrow and try and find that one spark

the plug that says you are here, you are forever, they are forever

All I know is longing 

All I feel is a longing 

And I fear I am not infinite like the books before me said but I am just temporary

Leaving nothing but a speck of soot and trash on this piece of rock before that speck gets stepped on and brushed over so many times that it’s no longer

Leaving nothing nothing nothing and I am gone

It is all temporary, we are temporary