for the first time, I breathe

Its 11:30 at night. My eyes hurt from how long they've been open. The whirring of my fan fills the silence - light from the hallway spills under my door, illuminating the bottom of my wardrobe. Julia sends me a link to a reddit post about battle jackets, the vibration travels through my bones, scaring me into remembering to blink. I'm not always happy, but I am for now. I am right now. I reach out for my water, by my bed, and for the first time today I breathe