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Nothing goes to plan, my life is crumbling ive lost both my friends and im so fucking stupid for thinking that i could write these feelings away and into books, theres nothing but suffering and remorse, but i might aswell pull my granddads move of drinking till he died, and im only 14, i actually wanted to do things and go places, but stupid fucking 14 year old me decides to make the worst fucking choices and you know what, i dont fucking care anymore, NOTHING FUCKING MATTERS ANYMORE AND THE ONLY REASON IM STILL ALIVE IS FOR MY FUCKIGN CATS, I hate being a fucking girl so goddamn much, im contemplating just cutting my organs out because ill never be an actual boy,Β
so, if and when i die, know it was probably an OD mix of alcohol and pescription meds bc why tf not, suffer
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ππ travis οΎ ryker . . β±
Hey :[ listen I know I'm just a person online but genuinely don't think about OD'ing on alcohol. I used to have a alcohol addiction as the same age as you but I stopped and for the better. I know you lost your friends, and hey I lose some too. But I feel like it isn't better to end your life over. I'm sure you're life with get more on track and happier soon :] even if it takes a little. I know fighting depression and wanting to commit suicide is hard but you got this, really you do. You just need to stay strong, especially for your other friends, and your cats. Anyways that's all I'll put for now but please stay safe and don't do anything horrible you might regret, and if you need me just ask ^_^
As well as you know life being tough and I get the hating being a girl part I don't like it either but I'm basically a trans guy who doesn't mind his body parts I guess. But also listen to this aswell, even if you think you're never gonna be a real guy, you actually are. Sure you may not look like one currently but I am sure eventually that time will come to where you actually do look like one. Even if it takes a while. And hey I see you as a guy. I mean I see any transmen as men in general just remember don't let gender dysphoria get to you at all. Just try to find the light in the darkness, that's what I always tell myself when I'm down. /pos
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