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I wanted to write this due I know there are people who want to get out of parents house as a teenager, so like I would like to give out my experience (especially since I'm mentally unstable/neurodivergent). I really hope this helps someone in someway especially if trying to do research and see others POVs in this situation.
So short introduction I'm 16 year old in Finland who is living in student rental apartments which is basically normal apartments that you would rent, but only for them who are studying in 10th grade (we call it tuva here)/high school/vocational school/university and etc. I'm diagnosed audhd (autism + adhd) and probably have other mental issues that are not checked out lmao.
So like I have been living in this apartment for a bit over 3 months now (the first apartment) and this apartment is made for three people.
So like I have started kind of feel like wanting to change apartments due this apartment is way too small for me (due 3 people living in, honestly would have been perfect for only 2 people.) But like the issue is that I don't know if I would even be able to take care of myself, the apartment as well as school at the same time if I move out living alone? It's already hard enough especially when depressive episodes hits, like I can barely go to the school during that and do school work.
I'm so glad I have roommates who we all share parts that we do so it's at least a bit easier... BUT LIKE dude my room is still slightly messy??? And like what's worse is that I don't like asking for help or like idk... I jst don't usually ask unless HAVE TO.
When I visited my mom like a week ago for the weekend I honestly kind of felt like wanting to move back??? But the town/city my mom lives at SUCKS so much and that's a huge reason why I wanted to move out... And like this city has the school I want to get in the next year. Idrk what to do, like I want to have my own apartment and have things however I want to, but then my health comes to that. I know I would not be capable to take care of an apartment by myself especially if trying to get to a high school... How do people mange that? I don't get it.
Like I do love living "by myself", but it's so hard to deal with... even with roommates.
Please jst think first for long time before moving, even if you're moving to different city.
I thought that I would be moving with my bff together to an apartment, but turns out we didn't get one. And like I thought moving from hometown to a city that I like would change me mentally BUT NO. Yeah of course it wouldn't, because the issues are not so easy to get "over with"! Please think of that first, don't think that you will be completely cured jst because of the change of an environment. Like sure the first month and a half in this city (before I moved to the apartment I kind of lived between my uncle and my sister) it was GREAT like seriously felt great, but then my brain got used to things and it became the same again.
Not trying to scare any of you, just heads up!!! Keep in your mind esp if you do struggle with mental issues.
Hope this helps out someone or idk?
FEEL FREE TO ASK QUESTIONS, I'll try my best to answer.ย
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Jasiyah!
Wow this must be a lot to handle
Seriously great job balancing all this esp since your so young. I never wanted to move out before I was 18 but love thinking about getting my own little apartment once I graduate high school. How was the switch from living with your parents/grandparents to moving in with roommates? idk I feel like I would feel pushed into the "real world" idk. Idk if u were asking for advice but I would make sure I was confident in getting my own apartment before moving out and leaving the roommates. Just make sure u can handle it!
YEAH It's a lot esp when depression hits, but it's good :D
Moving by yourself or even with roommates can be a bit hard to handle.
I do sometimes when I visit mom feel like I should just move back, but I just know living out of the town is just the best for me and I really just want to be by myself and I can see my older sister more often :D
And yeahh I'm for sure I'm not ready to move away by myself yet (esp since there is things with cleaning that I honestly physically can't which sucks like my brain just keeps moving to do the thing for weeks until I do it like dealing with moldy food or cleaning the toilet... gotta love autism), but actually me and my bff talked on new years what if we try to again to move together in an apartment like how we originally planed WHICH WOULD BENEFIT A LOT both of us. Hope it happens due we have planed that for like 2 years already, it didn't happen last time due the apartment we got a recommended was way too early for us to move in, sighs.
ALSO DEF HAVE TO MOVE out due half of my money goes to bus tickets.
For how the moving felt like, it was okay? I mean I think it didn't felt such a big move due me and my bff had to be "homeless" for like 2 months before we got apartments (we kept switching between my uncle's place and sister's place) so when got the apartment idk, it didn't really felt like anything special? It felt great sure, but when you realise you have to think abt food and such that's when it sucks rlly or if you don't have enough of money to get a bus to the apartment you have to walk 45min to 1h
ALSO I maybe recommend moving to a dorm if you will get in a collage/university after high school due they're either really cheap / free and due of that you can kind of have the small experience of living by yourself and there is not so many responsibilities yet (+ you can get a job and get more money peacefully) and then get own apartment once you're used to it. I think that would be better way to get to the adult life esp if you have disabilities or mental health issues. But you do you :D
by iilimato; ; Report
vanished
i hope you are better now,and u are right!
SORRRY LATE REPLYY. Been busy due of holidays sighs.
But yeah I'm doing better now, I think the break was kind of needed? I really hope it keeps being good w/o depression hitting hh :D
by iilimato; ; Report
vanished
i hope you are better now,and u are right!
iilimato
very real