Assorted Truths To Make You Smile [According to a Depressed Millennial]

All dogs are puppies.
This means the correct reaction to seeing a dog is to verbally go 'Puppy!'
Pets do not need to occur to enjoy the puppy spotting, but should be enjoyed if they're an option.
Puppers in clothes or shoes do double-serotonin hits.
Pigeons are pretty babies and should be spoken to softly. If you consider them dirty sky rats or anything similar, then we can no longer be friends.
Upon spotting a stray cat, speaking softly to them to offer affection rarely goes wrong.
If the stray does not approach, or runs away from you, do not chase. Simply say that you hope they stay safe, and that you love them.
If they do approach, pay attention to their body language and respect it. This covers both them giving a clear indication they do not like something you did as well as reassurance if a sudden move or sound startles them.
When in doubt, find a word or phrase that can make you laugh. This can be anything, from the tumblr-referenced 'beep boop' to the past-experience-of-me giggles at saying 'pudding'. There does not need to be logic, if it works for you.
Take a simple fact and phrase it in a way that sounds outlandishly goofy. For instance, the blood content of babies [1 cup] being the equivalent of a capri-sun for vampires.
The details are the same, but it's phrased so strangely that it's bound to confuse and amuse.
Never feel the need to apologize for what you enjoy, so long as it harms no one.
Write the self-indulgent xReader fanfic. Make the OC to insert into the fandom you're deep in.
Shame will only hurt you if you let it.

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