Coffees and kisses

Sometimes when my parents argue i get out of my room pretend i didn't hear anything and like do something in the kitchen, go kiss them on the cheek or something. I offer to make them coffee. 

So i can remind them that they love eachother so much that they created a family. That i am their daughter that loves them very much and will make them both coffee if they want one. 

I do this so i can remind them they are loved. 

It eases the mood for a few minutes. That's all i need. I need them to remember they are loved. 

Because loving is very easy. As much as it is to hate. But we focus on the hate so much we forget how easy the other one is. 

And i am my parents child. I want to solve it when there is a problem, mess up my words badly and hurt the other person accidently ,like my mom, and i shut myself off when the feelings become to overwhelming. 

I try and make sure to solve someones problem by making sure they are not alone and end up isolating myself in the end. 

I am my parents child and it hurts. Because i know when i have similar arguements with other people like that (like my parents) 

I feel like shit.

And i know my parents do too. I just want them to be happy tho. 

That's all i want. 

So that's why... I know i can't make their problems disappear, or i can't solve them. Because i am just their kid. So i give them a coffee and a kiss. So that they know i love them so much.