my life

Hi, people!! I don't know who reads these, if anyone, but I'm doing this for myself as well. It would be nice to get an outsider's perspective or opinion.

It's currently 10 a.m. I woke up at 7 a.m. and have been in bed since. As I write this, I’m laying in my bed, which is an absolute mess. Nobody else is awake right now, so I would usually go upstairs to enjoy the peace, but I’m not sure what my parents are doing, so it feels safer to stay down here.

My life for the past couple of months has been confined to my room—the entirety of my teenage life and childhood, but especially now. I’m not working at the moment; I’m doing school on my laptop, and I haven't left the house in three months. This might be hard for someone to imagine, but I truly have no other life than the one inside these four walls.

If you think about the last time you were sick or on a break, what's the longest you've stayed inside? Without a breath of fresh air. No social interactions except with family and those random people you meet online. Most people would probably say their longest time spent inside was a week. Do you remember the feeling of boredom that consumes you? You itch to get out, to talk, to do something with someone other than family. This feeling has consumed my everyday life, yet now I’ve become so numb to it. I could go months without stepping outside and not realize how long it’s been. If you stay inside long enough, you get so stuck inside your head that the thought of leaving doesn’t even come to mind.