I cannot explain

I cannot explain the pain of having moved at a steady pace for so long, but craving acceleration, and yet all that happens is things are slowing down. 

I grew up surrounded by friends I felt like I could talk to, but there is such scarcity now, and the amount of things I want to talk about, the amount of love and urgency is unfathomable, but I feel like I am the only one chugging along.

I am not alone, I am surrounded by others. But why am I the only one with such drive? How much can it hurt to see dullness in people you want to love?