writers block is absolutely awful

the last time I made an original song was maybe a week or two ago, and I felt like I barely put any effort into it. I made a song a few days before that and I really enjoyed that song though, but I feel like i'll never make something as good as that song was to me for a long while

before I started trying to get into this music shit again, I hadn't made a full song in almost 2 months and I felt absolutely horrible - I'd open FL, stare at the screen while fucking around with random instruments and then give up. if I'm lucky enough maybe I can come up with some sort of melody or beat but then i'll either say "oh I have no ideas" or "oh I'll get back to this at some point" and then I just never continue it for another 2 weeks to forever

it sucks so bad, and its not only this that's got me upset, this comic updating shit is messing me up horribly; I genuinely cant go a few days without updating because when I do then I start feeling like its my RESPONSIBILITY to update. once weeks start passing then I start feeling really shitty, I don't know what to do. Both of these combined with the fact that school has felt so long these past weeks and it's genuinely stressing me out so bad.

I just need a break so badly 

My friends aren't helping either, nor am I helping myself. I can barely control my anger normally but the stress school has put me under plus the continuous arguments my friends keep getting into amongst themselves as just made me into a literal explosive and I feel awful. I keep telling my friends I genuinely get pissed off when they say certain things but they continue saying it and then wonder why I get pissed. like?? fuck you too I guess? it's clearly obvious I have some sort of anger issue but they're always asking me "why are you so mad its just _____" or "its not that serious" like FUCK OFF oh my GOD I absolutely hate when people say that

i've lately been trying to get this shit under control but it's incredibly difficult with everything going on and my parents being nothing but useless bums; I trust my friends online and irl with more info than I trust my parents with and if that's not a horrible parenting sign I don't know what is

I'm sorry for posting all of this randomly I just needed to get this off my chest
have a good day (I realize half of this is just... not about writers block, my bad)