Vent (again xD)

I don't know what I seem to be doing wrong but for some reason it's just not possible for me to be on good terms with everyone, I'm not saying friends I just mean being on good terms. For example I was best friends with this girl and on good terms with the other, which was a big problem. Eventually it switched, and it was still a problem. I really don't understand it if I talk to one of them while best friends with the other it's a big deal and their mad at me. It just feels impossible to be on good terms with everybody and not be beefing with somebody. I wish it wasn't that way but for some reason everybody hates everybody's guts and sometimes I'm right in the middle of it, which eventually drags me into it. I do not wanna spend my life providing for everybody else and trying to be good with everybody, but I feel the need to. I'm a very emotional person which is a big problem in cases like this, I always think about everybody's feelings which leads to me trying to help everybody which then leads to me getting caught in some drama that had nothing to do with me. I've lost a lot of friends by doing this and honestly I don't wanna care so much about how others feel, but I do. It's good in some cases and in a way I'm happy I try to make everybody happy, but it's so draining and it always ends up hurting me and benefiting everybody else. I wish somebody would care about me like I care about them. Not just making sure I'm sort of ok, but actually caring and wanting what's best for me, not being passive aggressive and mad whenever I talk to someone they don't like. I can get where their coming from so I understand how they feel but when I think about how they feel I realize they only care about themselves and what's good for them. I've realized almost all my friends only care about themselves, maybe they don't wanna but their actions only benefit themselves. I love all my friends so much and I only want what's best for them but when they don't care about me it hurts because I'll never be able to leave them since I love and care about them so much. Who cares about me? The person reading this will probably say they do, but they don't. If anybody cared, at least one person I would be so grateful and not feel the need to write this. Except nobody shows they care. Yes, I have tried to communicate but the people I bring myself to talk to always seem to make it about themselves. I get it, I've done some stuff but I don't deserve this. I know and understand I deserve something but not all this.