No More Darkness

I think a part of me is sad because I need to understand myself. I can’t let that sadness fester inside me. When I wrote about how sad I was the “sad blog,” as I called it I looked at it again and realized something important. This is me breaking down why I feel this way. It wasn’t whining, and it wasn’t being a crybaby. It was me processing my emotions, piece by piece.
That sadness, as overwhelming as it felt, wasn’t something to be ashamed of. It was how I truly felt in that moment, and suppressing it wouldn’t have made it go away. Most people might try to stay quiet about those kinds of feelings, sweeping them under the rug and moving on. But that’s not me. I’ve always believed in bringing my emotions into the light because leaving them in darkness doesn’t solve anything it only lets them grow stronger, unchecked.
I also realized something else: the memories I have of the people who’ve come into my life deserve to be honored, even if those relationships didn’t last. No one deserves to be cast into darkness just because they may have brought me there at some point. If I were to do the same if I let myself bury those memories and pretend they didn’t matter it would make me no better than the pain they caused me. I refuse to let that happen.
Instead, I’m choosing to face my sadness, to understand it, and to transform it. Those moments, those people they shaped me. And even though they might have hurt me, they also taught me. I can’t let their impact stay hidden in the dark corners of my mind. By bringing my feelings into the light, I give them meaning. I give myself freedom. And I remind myself that I am not defined by the pain but by the way I rise above it.