im tired lol

my life is so funny 

everyday is just something new and i dont even understand anymore, like im tired and im stressed and i wanna kill myself but at the same time i dont wanna die cuz i have so much shit to do.      

idek what i like anymore, i dont have a passion for anything and people dont seem to understand that,i wish my life were my own, but its not, i wish i could do the things i liked and express myself freely but im so trapped in that house and im slowly dying, day by day.

they ask me why i don't have interest in anything but i do,
at least i did but they crushed every single one of my dreams, and now that im lost theyre blaming me when its their fault and its not fair.
why is it that anytime something goes wrong in my life its MY fault even though its not even my life,
they cant ever seem to blame themselves cuz they act like they can do no wrong and it hurts so much but they think im just being aggressive,
im not like this , this is just how they make me broooooo im so tired of this house its so fucking insane, like im actually gonna kill myself cus no one wants to understand me anymore like im trying my best but all they assume im doing is wasting my time, my phone doesn't stop me from doing shit, like im not that obsessed its literally the only thing that keeps me happy in that house when im surrounded by people who think im useless, like honestly they should just stop trying so act like theyre doing the best for me, cuz they only thing they're helping me do is want to kill myself the more and when i do die they'll say "oh i didn't know she was going through something","oh we never noticed" WHEN YOU FUCKING DIDDDDDD!!!! LIKE IM TRYING TO TELL YOU IM NOT DOING GOOD MENTALLY, ALL THE SIGNS ARE THERE, BUT YOU DONT FUCKING TAKE ME SERIOUSLY, YOU ASSUME ALL MY PROBLEMS IN LIFE ARE BECAUSE OF MY STUPID PHONE, when in actuality my phone is the only thing that brings me peace