A Shift In Time - Nature's Time - Time Loop - Time Time Time - Scattered

I personally feel I am crawling out of a cave. I didn't realize I was so deep in one. You see that's the thing. I feel the way in which we measure time is irrelevant to our actual experiences of time outside of work/school.

In my life, there was a time where days blended together for over a decade. The only measure of time was a ticking clock. Pressure building - second by second. Survival.

I would check my calendar, look at my planner, and attempt to organize the chaos. But how does one bring order to the ever shifting tides if they never really learned to swim? If all they have ever done is battle the waves? Overswept, pulled into darkness only to gasp for breath once more. Fighting to stay above the horizon. But the waves never stop.

The clock never seemed to match the timing in my head. The ticking. The constant noise. I couldn't shake it. I pressed on, simply doing. Achieving. Moving. Studying to understand. To find some solution. But I couldn't rid myself of the imbalance.

The frequency at which I vibrate doesn't seem to fit the frequency in which I often find myself. I become easily untuned, affected by my environment in ways that may come across as hyper-sensitive. And indeed that is what I am, hyper-sensitive to my internal imbalances, but more-so to the ones I find attacking the earth and its humanity, the ones in my external world. The imbalanced ways in which we teach our youth through our actions. How can we show them to love and care for themselves and each other if we don't do so for our planet? If we choose to deny what is at stake? Do they not see right through it? Or perhaps they simply feel right through it.

A bit scrambled - I know. But welcome to my brain. It's okay if you don't want to read it. I don't always think in linear paths, and that can be challenging for some. I understand. It's challenging for me too.

I wanted to take some time to consider how time - and our concept of it can be deeply affected by trauma, emotions, and schedules. By calendars and clocks - one's that aren't actually really based off of the cycles all around us. I wanted to think about frequency and how our vibrations and timing may impact what we resonate with and what we draw into our lives.

I have been noticing more and more how a ticking clock constrains me. It measures something immeasurable - for one can have 5 seconds of magic that last a lifetime over 50 minutes of nothingness. Time is expansive and infinite but clocks are finite.

I notice more and more I would love to attune myself to nature's time. To the sun and the moon. The rotating of the planets. That I have been. Rather than a man made instrument that keeps me in check for something I didn't sign up for. And the more that I tap into nature's rhythms - the more I tap into myself and my true being. I want to work on nature's time, not humans.

The difficulty is, I feel I am in a time-loop. I feel I am stuck on a clock. How do I leave it if everything around me functions around it? If everyone I know is ticking around me, asking me to tick with them? Can we somehow fall into being with ourselves, at whatever growth rate fits our needs? How can our environments support our growth without us hardening or cracking from the pressure?

Time is weighing on me these days - clearly lol. What about you? Thoughts on timing? Time? Time for a nap? Time for a party? Time to breath?

What would a day out of time look like for you?

And if you really wanna rabbit hole with me - check out the Law of Time and lemme know your thoughts. The Tzolkin, galactic signatures, and 13 moon cycle - I am all ears.

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