the friend i never knew

Three years I stood, an open hand,
A heart cupped like water, slipping like sand,
While you looked through me to ghosts behind,
A life pre-COVID you still long to find.

I offered laughter, an ear, a light,
Thinking friendship might shift your sight,
But each time you’d sigh with eyes elsewhere,
Pulled by memories frozen in mid-air.

You say, “I've always wondered what my life would be like if I'd never moved,”
As if I were an afterthought, a passing blur,
As if my presence were a dream you half-regret,
A ripple in the waters of your life you wish never stirred. 

Three years I stood, a silent plea,
A heart held out where yours should be,
But now I see it, the empty claim-- 
That I was your friend, but you never gave.