Predicaments

i type this quick and eagerly as there isn't much time.

seeing the fate of one's life sealed by the vows shared amongst everyone, the vows that pierce through their heart and soul. i sit intently as i know i am next in line, next to have my last name taken and my life redirect. as i am happy for her i can't help but loathe for myself, my tongue grows sour as i think of my own vows to say. what was then sweet is now disturbed by the taste of disagreements. the built up exasperation marches out of my mouth, sharply as desired, and though necessary, was all unintentional. i fold in regret, guilt swallows me alive as i grow embarrassed of my spleen. i fall to the knees i pray on, patellas aching with pain as i ask for forgiveness. but i dont deserve the forgiveness, and i know such.

ven