75 days (Entry: 1, Vent Diary)

11/7/24

Donald Trump winning the election hit like a truck, and it keeps rolling back over me, back and forth and back and forth. The aftermath is still rocking from Tuesday.. I remember me huddling around my computer that school night. I went to bed earlier, the votes were K:  99 vs. D: 137. The night was rocky... 

He won in the morning. It was just the citizen's vote though- but then he won the whole thing. The way the news tore through me and many others, I can still feel the pain. It was like a spit in the face of America, but the spit was mixed with- tobacco and cigar ash. The majority of the government is now Republicans, an even harsher punch to a gut.

Why would America choose, a felon whose quoted Adolf Hitler.. why would they choose such a man?! A man who says woman deserve to be punished even after he puts down the "no abortion" law or some shit. WHY WOULD AMERICA CHOOSE A MAN, THAT SAYS HE COULD SHOOT UP A PLACE AND NOT LOOSE A SINGLE. VOTE. I don't know.

My name is Michelle, I go by he/him pronouns.. and I am a trans person. I fit most of the qualifications to loose my rights. All of them- BLUE SKADOODED if you will.

...I can still hear the murmurs on campus, the "Oh now I can pay my grocery's", "Oh now I can afford gas".. it scared the shit out of me. I didn't want to stand next to them- with my "he/him" pin on my bookbag and my converses, I wanted to disappear into the swarms of people coming down the hall and hide in the bathroom of the school. 

I wonder how they feel, I wonder if they even know or if they are just following the examples their parents gave them. Do they know how it feels to be scared? Terrified? To think you could die? What about to be persecuted?

I wonder.. oh God forgive them.